What I’ve learned in the last 19 years of marriage
Though Mercy and I share values, we see the world differently. My perspectives are no better than hers. So, rather than try to change her, I choose to be flexible and to seek common ground in every issue. Winning the love of my life is more important than winning an argument.
Though Mercy wants me to lead her, she also wants to be fully involved. So, I listen even to her body language and emotions. Rather than seeing faults, I see the beauty in our differences and focus on her strengths. Also, I take full responsibility for our marriage as the leader of the family. And I take initiatives but consult her in every project we undertake.
Though many people around the world see me as their mentor, Mercy wants me to be her role model. So, I lead her by my own life. I live a transparent life. I account for every coin I earn. I spend most of my time with her. We use the same password for our phones and emails.
Though Mercy and I love God and love one another, we’ve learned that marriage does not work by default. Lovers must work on their marriage DAILY. So, we’re both intentional on our marriage goals. Above all, we pray together as a couple every day on our knees for only God can keep a marriage.
Dr. K. N. Jacob